is like a family. Only without the weird Uncle Bert and no fighting at family reunions...
This place has given me a connection to some of the finest ladies out there!
Before I found SWC, I felt like an awful person. How could I have so much anger and so much resentment toward my stepmom/second wife situation? Didn't I know from the onset that I was getting involved with a man with kids? Why did the last minute schedule changes and the endless comparisons bother me so? Now that I'm a member, I realize it's all normal. My feelings and frustrations were not unique to me. Not in the least. The greatest gift SWC has given me is peace of mind. It doesn't matter how messed up your situation is, there is someone at SWC who has been there, done that, and survived.
Don't judge each day by the harvest you reap, but by the seeds you plant.
Robert Louis Stevenson
What a well balanced outlet
SWC has been for me. As a woman, mother, wife, friend, custodial bonus mom, SwC nutures every aspect of me.
I have the opportunity to be accepted as I am, to share, to learn, laugh, weep and be silly.
How could you go wrong?
Twenty years from now you will be more disappointed by the things that you didn't do than by the ones you did do. So throw off the bowlines. Sail away from the safe harbor. Catch the trade winds in your sails. Explore. Dream. Discover.
~Mark TwainAll I can say is....
It makes you feel like your not alone!!!!!!No subject
Just when you thought nobody understood you, and all you ever got was "but you KNEW what you were getting into when you married a man with children", you find the Cafe! Suddenly, you are NOT ALONE! You have hundreds of women who have been there, done that, and can offer advice, support, a shoulder to lean and, and FINALLY, some UNDERSTANDING!
If you feel alone in your situation, you'll feel much better once you're here. What I learned is no matter HOW BAD I thought I had it - someone else has it WORSE!
I came to SWC with feelings of frustration and sadness. I felt misunderstood and incompetent as a second wife/stepmom
. This place showed me that there were people who understood how I was feeling
. These Sistahs have dealt with the issues I am dealing with, they are sooo wonderful when you have a problem or a question. They go out of their way to post any information that might help, or just a few words to lift my spirits!
We get serious about legal issues
, we laugh at ourselves and each other (in a positive way)
, and when one of us are down, EVERYONE lends support
This site and the wonderful ladies here have shown me that my feelings are natural, my concerns are valid, and that being a second wife brings issues that can drive anyone a little
from time to time. SWC
makes the insurmountable mountain of blending a family a mere mole hill.
I am fairly new to SWC, but it has become my home. I had belonged to several "other" stepmom groups, but the members only seemed to complained about how much they hated being a stepmom. I felt guilty because I have a great relationship with my custodial skids and wanted to meet other women in the same situation.
I found SWC 2 years ago.. and I hope to be a memeber for a lifetime. There is no place like SWC; so much love, support and sisterhood here. It was truly heaven sent. I could not ask for a better place to share my thoughts, views and friendship.
THANK YOU SWC!! SWC...
...should be a requirement for all Second Wives and Stepmothers! After 7 yrs. of feeling totally alone as a full-custody stepmom, I stumbled upon this site and it has saved my sanity, given me hope, and more support and resources than I ever could have found on my own!
MT3-- SWC --
I came here to vent my frustrations and learn how to be a good stepparent. What I found was a sisterhood among those going through some of the same things I was. It's a great place to talk in a safe environment.
I have never seen....
.. such support for women by other women without any of the judgement and bitchiness of other female environments. The support I have received has been constructive and unconditional. There is always someone there for me, and I love being able to be there for my online 'sistahs'. My friendships have touched my heart to the core, kept me as sane as possible in the chaos of my situation.
SWC is where I've learned that I'm not alone and that my feelings, although they might not be nice, are my feelings, and being a SW/SM is not easy.
in being a part of SWC, i realize that i am not alone in the issues involved with step-families. there are many forums, ranging from PAS (Parental Alienation Syndrome) to dealing with the in-laws, from topics concerning non-custodial parents to discussing blended families. and there is even a forum dedicated to us step-moms who are trying to conceive our own in this crazy life we chose.Cool!
If it weren't for SWC, I'd be a bald-headed, raving lunatic. This place is THE best site for stepmoms & second wives- hands down!
Not only is this site a resource for stepparenting, it's an amazing, enlightening and fun place to hang! I consider the women here to be my sisters.
I came here looking for support and friendship and have found it in bucketloads. we share the ups and downs, successes and failures that go hand-in hand with step-parenting. I'm proud to call all the swc ladies my sisters.
is the only place where I can come and feel that people truly understand what I am going through. The support and advice I get here has really helped me get through some tough times. I consider these women my friends.
You're among friends here. The common link of being in a "second" relationship binds us together. From redecorating "her" house to dealing with "her kids" you will find support and advice from those who have walked a mile in your shoes.
I felt I was the only one who was dealing with step children and an ex wife who resembles the she devil. No one close by could really understand my situation and offer me support, but these ladies can keep me sane from the other side of the world!
SWC Is AWESOME
SWC helps keep things in perspective in a sometimes very warped situation. The friendships developed here have helped me get through many hard times. No subject
This site brings some sanity to an insane situation!
It's sent from heaven.
Northern New Yorker. (That's NY with a neat attitude!)SWC
has made me feel like I'm not alone in my situation. I not only have friends here, I have a family.I thought
my situation was unique and I was the only person dealing with such a bizarre situation. And that maybe BB and DH were right, I was the problem. What a relief it was to learn that so many others have dealt with the same crazy stuff. Finally someone(s) to share with who truly understood what it was like being the second wife! The best thing about the Cafe
is its diversity. We have women here from all walks of life from coast to coast and beyond sharing their stepmotherhood stories. The comraderie here is like no other on the web!
To the Haven that is SWC. This place and the wonderful women who make it up
literally saved my marriage and my LIFE!
This site is the reason
my husband's ex is still alive and I am not in jail.
You are not alone!
SWC has been a sanity-saver for me—and has also made my husbands life easier ... after reading the experiences of others, and venting about my own situation in a completely supportive environment, I found most of the stress of being a stepmom with no biological children (by choice) fading away. I'm more at peace with the situation, and my husband doesn't get sniped at every day! No subject
Imagine how you look in your best underwire bra.
The support you'll find here BEATS THAT!!
has saved my sanity. I though everything I was feeling was wrong and I was being selfish and I should just accept my partner has teenage children that should just love as if they are my own. This site has help me understand that I don't have to love them or even like them if I don't and in knowing that I don't have to it made it so much easier to like them.
This place has kept me sane and stopped me from doing anything rash. It's like having a big get together of girlfriends that know exactly what it's like to go through the difficulties of a second family.
has brought me friendships and support that I never expected. I feel so blessed to have found this site. SWC has been wonderful!
When you are at the end of your rope, an you think no one else could ever understand how you feel; well someone has here. It is nice to have friends and feel loved by others who have been in your shoes Testimonial
It was amazing to me to see that I was not alone. I have been here at SWC for a year and it has not only saved my sanity many times, it has saved my marriage as well.
SWC is da
~ Beth ~ Manteno, Illinois ~ The Best Place on the World Wide Web!
This is a place where women come together aand share a special bond so strong that nobody can destroy it. Here we laugh
together, and get angry
together. For every question
there is an answer....For every problem - a solution
.....For every tear shed - a shoulder to catch it
......and for every hug - one to reciprocate it
.SWC has been my salvation
in a world where everyone else told me "I knew what I was getting into." I felt isolated by my family, my son was on the verge of a nervous breakdown, and I for the first time in my life, felt the need to take valium. SWC has made things clearer for me, and has made sense of the nonsense. I honestly do not know where I would been today if I hadn't found this site a few months ago. These women are amazing.
a lifeline in the sometimes tumultuous sea of stepmothering and secondwives. You are never alone here.
has been a great outlet for me. I get to see that my crazy life as a SW/SM is shared by so many others. I reap the most from hearing all the different perspectives all these wonderful girls can give in a single situation.
SWC rocks baby!
~Tam~ The Cafe rocks!!!
What can I say about such an amazing place? Here I have found friendship, laughter, love, acceptance, advice, ideas, support, kinship, but most of all, I've found FAMILY. I love my Cafe sistahs! You ladies are the BEST!
I'm so proud that we have an amazing group of administrators, moderators and our very own technical guru, "The Man" (the ONLY man who's allowed on our site!) to help keep the balance and facilitate good communication amongst the sistahs. This also ensures the safety of our members, as well as the system integrity of this little slice of heaven we like to call The Cafe.
SWC has been a lifesaver
I joined SWC after searching the internet trying to find answers on how to cope with being a stepmom to adult SDs.
Thanks to SWC, I've seen that my situation is not any different than other Stepmoms. I've found that the sistahs on this site are warm, compassionate and always have something uplifting to say.
Also, I have found that this site is not just about being a stepmom or second wife...there are also alot of forums with stuff on it to put a smile on your face The Second Wives Cafe
Has been and continues to be my safe haven
I have grown over the years I have been a member and met many wonderful friends and sisters of the heart
in the process.
is a great site to help deal with all aspects of your life. At first I thought it was just about stepmothering, but I have gotten so much support on health issues, relationships, children, and life in general! SWC is now the place I come to first when I have ANY problem!
And the woman on it brought sanity to what was at one time an insane situation. If you want to get support in fostering positive relationships with your stepchildren and overcoming the obstacles of dealing with a sometimes difficult ex wife - this is the place for you!
is my sanity and safe haven. I am a custodial stepmom to four kids, but no biological children. I felt alone and confused until I found SWC. Here I have found multiple friends and boards that have made me feel I belong, that I am not selfish or strange, and that I can cope with whatever new hurdles are put in my way. I can find answers to my many questions (or vent my frustrations) here without ever feeling belittled or that I may upset someone. It's truly a blessing that I am thankful for in my chaotic life.
helped me to realize I'm not the only one in this situation
have I found that I am not alone, but at SWC, I recieve actual HELP. When I am at the end of my rope, there is someone here who has been there, done that. Others who have seen the in's and out's and can steer me in the right direction.
SWC gives me hope, help, and perspective. I'd be utterly lost without the support I receive here on a daily basis.
"But you KNEW what you were getting into!" - Ever hear those words spoken by somebody NOT in a stepfamily and wanted to tear their hair out? Then this is the place for you!!! This site has been a saving grace for me and for my family. I come here to vent, get advice, gain perspective, and gain insight. I have FINALLY found a place where people DO understand!!!
Chosing the journey of being a stepmom and a second wife is one that those who have not been there have a hard time understanding. Until I found SWC I had a hard time dealing with the kids, their mother and the issues we had. I was never sure if my reactions were the right ones and I often felt guilty for some of the emotions I had. Here at SWC I learned it is ok if I want to wring the kids' mom's neck, it's ok if the kids get on my nerves sometimes and overall it's ok to feel all the normal feelings a stepmom has. The sisterhood here is supportive and with SWC you always know you are not alone.No subject
As far as my situation I finally don't feel so alone, I finally found people that could relate. I can't imagine what I would have done without this placeNo subject
"SWC is a SW/SM's haven from despairity, oppression, legal conflicts, and even spousal tensions. This is where you will find and create friendships, hear recommendations and ideas on parenting, and get lots of hugs when you need them".
VickyI love SWC!
No matter what your issue is, someone on SWC has been there done that and can give you a fresh perspective. It's about way more than just being a stepmother and second wife. It's a safe place to vent about anything that's happening in your life, the support from these women is truly priceless. And when you find yourself offering support back to someone in need, you realize your own healing has already begun.
SWC = Sanity Life Preserver!!!